Every morning when the coffee’s on,
I rediscover that color in your eyes, in its gold and its bronze
That quote is from a song on Foy Vance’s recent album, The Joy of Nothing. It’s a beautiful album that chronicles the various stages of the disintegration of his marriage. This may be odd, but I often enjoy listening to sad songs about divorce and the loss of love. Sometimes I like to imagine what life would be like without Theresa, and it makes me very sad. Since Theresa and I are happily married you might think this a little morbid. You may be right, but let me explain:
The other day I was watching a clip of Louis C.K. being interviewed by Conan O’Brien discussing his hatred of cell phones. He justifies this hatred by describing an experience he had while driving in which he became very sad for no particular reason. His immediate instinct was to reach for his phone, to create some kind of distraction. But instead, he embraced the sadness, pulled his car over and started crying. What he realized in that moment is that technology has a way of minimizing both our sadness and our happiness. You can’t fully experience one without the other.
Odd as it may seem, this is why I enjoy sad songs. The sadness they allow me to experience only serves to enhance the joy I feel whenever I’m with Theresa. Her presence in my life has made me so overwhelmingly happy, that at times it’s almost numbing. A little pinch of sadness allows me to appreciate her more fully. It helps me to once again marvel at the beautiful color in her eyes.
And since today is Theresa’s 29th birthday, it’s only appropriate that I list some of my favorite things about her. Our new favorite tradition.
1. She is a voracious snuggler.
2. She wants to move to LA, or New York, or anywhere with me. Just because it’d be fun.
3. She could care less about sports.
4. But she loves hiking.
5. She likes to make fun of babies, but she loves our nephews with all her heart.
6. She is wise.
8. When she stands on the edge of the bathtub to get a better look at her outfits.
9. She folds a mean tshirt.
10. How she has made our little apartment into a home.
11. She always – Always – Wants Mexican food for dinner.
12. Popcorn Sundays.
13. She’s not afraid to call you out if you’re being dumb.
14. She’s always offers to help my mom in the kitchen when we visit.
15. She’s content with less.
16. She can appreciate a good Manhattan.
17. She’s never smoked ever.
18. She doesn’t mind if I smoke my pipe from time to time.
19. Her fit attitude.
20. Bright Pink Nikes.
21. Her love of excellent jackets.
22. She has never stopped encouraging me as I try to make it as a freelance designer.
23. She thinks I’m amazing. I think she’s amazing. It’s a vicious cycle of awesome.
24. She is generous and hospitable.
25. She accepts people of all kinds.
26. She gets really angry when slow people don’t move aside on the trail.
27. She loves to run back down the mountain.
28. She is endlessly creative.
29. The gold and bronze flecks in her blue eyes. 6 years and I still love finding them.
Happy birthday Theresa. I love you more than the moon and stars.